The Cast of Netflix’s Sex, Love & goop | Goop
Already watched Sex, Love & goop on Netflix? Still thinking about the brave and vulnerable and wonderful participants in the series? Wondering what they’re up to now? Here you go.
Erika on left, Damon on right
DAMON
How have you been since filming the show?
I’ve been great. The big news is that Erika and I are now expecting our first baby in December, which is at the forefront of our thinking and emotions. Besides that, we’ve been so busy working on some sort of nest egg for him—it’s a boy—that our sex life is more like a get-it-when-we-can type of thing, which in turn has added more spontaneity for us.
What did you learn that you wish others could know?
More of that Tantric shit! I wanna become a Tantric Jedi Master so I can Darth her Vader when she’s walking down the aisles of Costco.
What are you working on now?
Erika’s children’s book, Chocolates, on ErikaBaty.com, is doing very well at small offerings right now. We’ll soon get it into bigger stores and launch it on a larger scale. I’ll be launching a children’s book, Little JoJo Superstar, on LittleJoJo.com early next year.
But right now we’re really trying to finish a sexy ABC book for adults called Apples, Bananas, and Cherries. After our sessions and experiences, we were super inspired to complete this idea we’d talked about some time ago. Now is a great time for it!
What’s in your sex toolkit?
Well, I’m still pretty simple, so my sex toolkit is just my fingers, lips, and my thang. But our toolkit now includes blindfolds, oils, and friggin’ wolverine claws, which are close by the bed, serving a dual necessity of kinky and security.
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ERIKA
How have you been since filming the show?
Knocked up. By my husband, of course! Growing a little chocolate baby boy. I’ve been forewarned that sex and intimacy can lead to this.
What did you learn that you wish others could know?
No matter how much love a couple has, sometimes one person emotionally and sexually speaks French while the other is speaking English—both in and out of the bed.
Being aware that there are different Erotic Blueprints: energetic, sensual, kinky, etc. I am excited to continue exploring all of them. Plus, education has really helped both of us understand that learning and being open to each other’s love languages doesn’t have to be frustrating any longer.
Investing time intimately and sexually educating ourselves is something that we never knew we needed, and we are now more surprised than ever that this part of sex and intimacy isn’t talked about more. Just like anything else successful, you have to put in time, effort, and sometimes a lot of work to “deck the halls” in the romance department.
Also, as Jaiya explains, orgasms don’t have to be slot A going into slot B; it can be anywhere on your body. I now know I’ve been having delicious orgasmic experiences all over my body and just never thought of them as such.
What are you working on now?
Educating myself more on vaginal births versus C-sections. Neither option sounds sexy to me, and I’m starting to freak out a bit about this whole birthing thing.
Trying to find a sweet name for our baby boy; we’ve had to stop talking about it since we couldn’t agree.
The last couple of months Damon and I have both been traveling separately for work, so I’m trying to plan some fun and sexy date nights for when we are reunited for the holidays.
I’m working on getting my online shop launch party ready. Together, we’re working on some more sweet things to publish.
What’s in your sex toolkit?
A kitty cat mask, Jaiya’s Erotic Blueprint course, a newfound appreciation for random intimate activities like body painting and blindfolded food tasting, yum…I’m also adding the Ultraplush Self-Heating G-Spot Vibrator to my wish list for Mr. Claus. Since we’ve been both naughty and nice this year, it’s most certainly deserved; everything warm and sensual keeps me heated all year long.
Sera on left, Dash on right
Dash and Sera
How have you been since filming the show?
Sera: Wild! Every moment has been accounted for, without much downtime.
Something we talk a lot about is the importance of queer visibility and how crucial it is. We never saw relationships like ours on TV when we were kids, so we feel very lucky to have the opportunity to share a piece of our story and all the hard work we’ve put into our relationship, especially at its beginning stages.
The world is unpredictable, and it can be unsettling. Because I have shown someone all my parts and pieces, our love is only getting stronger. The magical parts, and the not-easy parts. I feel like I no longer have to hide who I am. Every day is also a new day to start again and brings the opportunity to make things even better.
Dash: Busy! We’ve been working hard on ourselves and our relationship. We’ve also been working on our business and art careers.
We were both diagnosed with ADHD during the pandemic, and things have been a whirlwind mixture of feelings. I’m seeing life in a whole new way. I have a sadness for not having known this about myself sooner, and I’ve also found forgiveness and acceptance of who I am and how I move through the world. I’m able to not be so hard on myself and cut myself some slack. I have a better understanding of why sometimes I can give so much to people around me and other times appear totally checked out or dismissive. I see my hypervigilance with a new perspective, too. Sera and I connect big-time around both having ADHD. And we talk about how it’s affected relationships throughout our lives. We’re able to see the role it plays in our relationship. We’ve held each other as we’ve moved through feelings of shame and acceptance. Things that once made us feel estranged and distant from people have now brought us together with a common bond in understanding that our brains just work differently than most people’s, and that’s totally cool. In fact, we now realize that having ADHD is our superpower.
I’m feeling so grateful to be in a relationship with someone who makes me feel safe and seen and loved. We’ve been through a lot over the past couple of years together (we’re approaching our two-year anniversary), and I’m really proud of us. And I’ve never felt more in love.
What did you learn that you wish others could know?
Both: Neither of us has ever started off a relationship in couples therapy. We talk a lot about how valuable it is to start some type of therapy together early in a relationship. Couples therapy doesn’t have to come at the end of a relationship or be something you do to bandage something that is broken. When started early on, it can create a beautiful foundation for a long-lasting partnership. If therapy feels like too much, or isn’t financially accessible, or your partner isn’t into it, even just reading books or listening to podcasts together about relationships and having conversations about relationships can be helpful. Something we’re now able to accept is that every day isn’t going to be perfect, and that one of us is bound to mess up. But with communication and patience, you can get to the other side. If you’re fortunate enough to do therapy together, it can help to deepen your understanding of your partner and yourself, how to communicate what you need, and how to better understand your partner’s needs. It can help to develop empathy and love for your partner and learn how to express this love in ways that can make your partner feel supported and loved.
Also, have your therapist’s number on speed-dial.
You don’t have to repeat your family’s past or past trauma. Good or bad. Your life is yours.
What are you working on now?
Both: So much! We have become partners in every way. From the moment we wake up in the morning, we start buzzing around, working on projects and collabs—think Pee-wee’s Playhouse on MDMA. We’ve recently opened a new storefront in Virgil Village (Los Angeles): Studio Gay TV, a place where Sera takes care of her existing clients’ hair while our favorite ’90s movies play in the background on white Panasonic VHS television sets. We’ve added a new addition to the hair menu that we are calling a “psychic mirror appointment.” Sera is known to cut her clients away from the mirror to give space for positive conversations because everyone knows that looking in the mirror for too long can bring you down. Now you can replace the mirror with our good friend who is a psychic, and she blasts you with positive energy and spiritual guidance.
Dash is crazy-busy building out our gay department store, both online and IRL. We’re making a home clubhouse where artists can meet and show their work. We’re also gearing up to launch a collaboration together: Love Monsters, a playful lifestyle brand, which has also led us to design a needed addition to the sex biz. Stay tuned, 2022.
Just like we didn’t see queers on TV growing up, we also didn’t have spaces to celebrate our queerness. Creating a place for our community is very important to us. There aren’t many gay spaces around, and right now, more than ever, people need to be together. This is a top initiative for our business.
If you’re in LA, come say hi to us at Studio Gay TV.
What’s in your sex toolkit?
Sera: First, I wanna share that knowing your own body and what turns you on is what I believe to be key when becoming a good sex partner. Sex toys are the best tools for unlocking what you like, and they’re also very empowering. I used to try to buy everything, but now we get into the rhythm with a few favorites at a time before adding new “friends” to the bunch. One of our favorite toy companies is the New York Toy Collective. They have the best silicone dildos, and I often recommend them to straight girlfriends when they are between boyfriends. And Dash loves the STP Strap for packing.
Another fave is the classic Magic Wand. I used to think the Magic Wand was a joke, but it’s no joke! Right now the Magic Wand is literally part of our pandemic pod. It’s the gift that just keeps on giving.
Looking at the toys that goop has available, I really do want to try everything. I love how positive the toys look. And the French Lover Vibrator is very intriguing. I’m adding this to my holiday wish list.
Dash: Lube. Lube is everything. Take note: Lube keeps bodies feeling healthy and taken care of. And lube makes sex waaaay hot! It makes us feel extra close, too. Our personal fave is Sliquid. It’s slippery-slick and good for sensitive bodies. We literally have it in both bedside drawers and always keep some in our travel case.
Michael on left, Joie on right
Joie
How have you been since filming the show?
Even though I’m retired, I am extremely busy with traveling, welcoming a new grandson, attending theater again, and participating in various group organizations.
What did you learn that you wish others could know?
A thought about body image I learned was to focus on the good times and experiences that your body has endured, like the birth of two children and many good meals. Many times women, especially, have unrealistic views of their bodies. My goal is to strive to be healthy and to not have an unhealthy image of myself.
What are you working on now?
I constantly remind myself that relationships take work and to not forget to thank people and tell them you love them. Then through your actions, show them as well!
What’s in your sex toolkit?
Our sex toolkit always includes a vibrator and oral gel.
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Michael
How have you been since filming the show?
It’s been hectic. In April we went on a trip to Joshua Tree for Joie’s birthday. In May, my daughter in San Diego had a second child. Joie also spent a few weeks in June in Bakersfield when her daughter had a baby boy. My consulting business has been busy with a few new clients. My daughter from Tahoe has been down to visit a few times to see her new niece and then to escape from the smoke from the fires. Joie and I did another trip in September to Big Basin National Park and Las Vegas, and she has also traveled to Indiana to see her family a couple of times. I fly to Nashville on Tuesday and will meet up with Joie there. We will spend a few days seeing the sites and then continue on to Florida for a wedding.
What did you learn that you wish others could know?
It is important to be always working on a relationship and communicating what you like, what you don’t like, what you want, etc.
What are you working on now?
Right now, we are just trying to connect regularly with some intimacy as she often falls asleep early in front of the TV, so morning quickies tend to be our go-to. Intimacy is great and it often leads to sex, which is also great. Occasionally I will get Joie to prioritize that, but she has more than a little bit of FOMO and is often trying to watch a TV show or we’re out late and we are both tired at bedtime. I am trying to convince her that spending some time connecting should be a priority and that we can always watch that TV show later. We watch virtually everything on DVR or streaming, so it’s not like we can’t do both!
What’s in your sex toolkit?
I think Joie would be happy to test anything in the goop sex shop, and I would be willing to work with her.
Shandra on left, Camille on right
Camille
How have you been since filming the show?
We’ve been great! Just busy working, living our day-to-day lives. The lessons we learned from the show have really shaped what we do and our future decisions. I personally have been working on my self-worth.
What did you learn that you wish others could know?
I wish others could know that you’re not alone. In so many ways, we are all going through similar things in life. We all go through seasons, and sometimes they’re good, and sometimes they’re bad. What we learn from them is the important part. If you’re learning, you’re growing.
What are you working on now?
We are both really focused on our careers at the moment, so the thing we’re working on is just spending as much quality time as we can with each other. We are also in the process of planning our wedding, and that takes up a lot of our time as well.
What’s in your sex toolkit?
Honestly, coconut oil. We love that Darshana introduced this product to us, and it’s just such a simple swap! It’s totally changed our sex lives. If I could recommend one thing, it’s that.
Shandra
How have you been since filming the show?
I’ve been great! This experience has taught me to look at life a little differently and much more positively. I recently got a new job working in such a great environment, which was so important to me, to love what I do for a living. I used to work in an environment where I just wasn’t happy and I’d come home exhausted and stressed. I’ve also grown as an individual. I’m much more delicate with my time and energy, taking a break from all the stresses of life when I need to, listening to my body when it needs me to slow down. And Camille and I communicate more than ever if something is on our minds.
What did you learn that you wish others could know?
Something I definitely learned is to take my time. When we were working with Darshana, she taught us how to breathe and just be in the moment. Let our minds go, especially when Camille and I are with each other. We just need to be there and be present. Life has such a funny way of bringing us down sometimes. I know I’m extremely guilty of pushing my own boundaries, but it’s okay to just stop and be with each other in the moment. I know this might not all be on the show, but I believe it took me an hour and fifteen minutes to relax on the table with Darshana.
Another thing I learned was that I’m not broken. Luckily, I have a partner who is patient and communicative. Every woman is different—I know Camille and I are very different when it comes to sex. I think that certain topics are hard for others to talk about, and I’m definitely not an expert in any way, but it’s important to know that you are not broken. Discover yourself and try new things you may like. Being more open and honest, I’m able to connect with Camille on all new levels.
What are you working on now?
The most important thing I’m working on at the moment is to give myself some rest. I’m currently working three jobs because we have a wedding to pay for. But to also not push myself too hard. My body needs rest, and so does my mind at times. And with three jobs, that can be hard. But Camille and I try to spend as much time together as possible, even if it’s just sitting on the couch watching Netflix together. This experience was such a roller coaster of emotions and such a positive and vulnerable experience that I just need to embrace it. We were given this platform and this opportunity that changed us completely. Believe it or not, I’m not one to talk openly about sex or personal things that I may be going through, but this has gotten me to open up more than I could ever imagine. And it feels amazing. There was a moment for Camille and me right before we filmed with Darshana. We were sitting on the hotel bed and we just looked at each other and said, “Well, we’re here. Let’s give it everything we’ve got because we probably will never get to do something like this again.” Best decision we ever made.
What’s in your sex toolkit?
Oh, here we go, haha. Well, the producers definitely loaded up some fun things in my car after filming. But Camille and I like different things. I’m a big fan of the Womanizer. I definitely would love to try the French Lover in the goop sex shop, along with the Sila vibrator. We have a list of ones we’d love to try, like the Double-Sided Wand and the Firefighter. I’m a big fan of external stimulation. And don’t forget your coconut oil!
Felicitas on left, Ramas on right
Felicitas
How have you been since filming the show?
I’ve been great. I’ve been working a lot and spend most of my free time on the soccer field. We’ve enjoyed being a soccer family!
What did you learn that you wish others could know?
First of all, if you’re going through a difficult time, don’t be so hard on yourself. Second, girlfriends make everything better! And finally, giving your partner the benefit of the doubt goes a long way.
What are you working on now?
I continue to work on boundary-setting, managing my own expectations, and balancing my life. Juggling career, family, and partnership is not easy, but it’s so rewarding.
This article was originally published by goop.com. Read the original article here.
