It Still Hurts When Your Parents Get Divorced As An Adult: Here’s How To Cope

If your parents divorce when you are an adult, you will likely contend with several challenges that many others do not understand. Friends or family members may say to you, “Aren’t you glad they didn’t divorce when you were six years old?” or “Come on, you’re an adult. You can roll with it, right?” The expectation is that you should not be so affected by your parents’ separation because you are not a child.

Of course, this is not true at all. Adult children of divorcing parents report feeling fear, anger, worry, confusion, and grief after learning about their parents’ split. They question the very foundation of their identity, and if their parents waited to separate just until they were out of the house, many wonder if their entire lives were based on a lie.

Unfortunately, parents also underestimate the impact their divorce has on their adult children. Many may have waited until their kids were grown so that the split would be “easier” on them. But, when divorcing parents of adult children think this way, they completely disregard how their kids feel, which, in turn, creates even more stress.

If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed and alienated by your parents’ gray divorce: